Saturday, February 23, 2013

Special Delivery

I pictured the whole birthing thing like I do most things in the movies.

You know Ben and I would be sleeping, I would suddenly wake up when my water daintily broke, I would startle Ben awake and say "It's time"  he would then hop out of bed and run around like a madman.  I would grab our perfect pre-packed hospital bags and sit on a birthing ball for a minute while the car warmed up.  Then we would begin speeding to the hospital, maybe even get pulled over for speeding and when the cop realizes the situation we get a siren-led police escort the rest of the way to the hospital!


You see, when I graduated from BYU in December, my health insurance was no more. I became one of the 48 million.  After a lot of thought and going back and forth, we decided the best thing to do for us was to have the baby in Canada where we have family and Alberta Health Care (ie-FREE).  There are definitely pro's and con's in this situation.  I needed to be up there by at least 37 weeks just in case anything happened really early but Ben has had work and school in Utah and couldn't just take a month off.

So last Monday I took a road trip home to Lethbridge and Ben will be staying there until "It's time".
Statistics with first pregnancies have me hopeful that everything will work out, that Ben will get here in time for the delivery and then we will stay up here at my house for a week or two before heading back to Utah.  This baby has got to keep cooking for a couple more weeks though!

The hardest part for me is these three weeks we are going to be apart for the last part of my pregnancy.  I have become pretty dependant and needy these days, a hand massage before bed, a back scratch to put me back to sleep in the middle of the night when I can't sleep if my life depended on it.  Help in and out of all vehicles, him carrying everything over five pounds, my someone to lean on as I waddle around and the moral support when I feel so done being pregnant and sick.

SO please wish us luck that Ben will be able to make it here in time SAFELY and his school won't suffer too much.

PS: I have had dreams about labor almost every single night since I  have been home.  Last night my good friends at Seattle Grace Hospital (Greys Anatomy) delivered my baby for me after BYU turned me away.  Alex and Meredith said they would do it pro-bono but I had to deliver on the floor because they couldn't do it for free if I was in the bed.  So Callie Torraz delivered my baby for me on the floor while the rest of them cheered me on.  I sure love those guys.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

it's a love story...

"Hey Zac if you pay me 5 bucks I'll roll your silverware for you"

Nothing like those romantic words to make my heart flutter.  This is when I knew Ben loved me too.

We both were servers at Chili's and I had been swooning over Ben for weeks.
 I saw him there my first shift filling up plastic mugs with coke and he literally took my breath away.  
I went home and told my roommates I was going to marry this guy at work named Ben. 
 I would check the schedule and try to pick up shifts when he was working, 
I would check our table assignments to see if we would be on the same side of the restaurant 
and there was nothing I looked forward to more than closing time when we would load up a booth 
with a huge pile of napkins, forks and knives and roll silverware together.

We had small flirtations but I didn't know if he liked me back yet.  
You see, rolling silverware at the end of the shift was the bane of every servers existence   
Everyone hated it because it took forever, was monotonousness 
and at the end of an eight hour shift where your wage is $2/hour you just want to go home.  
The only reason I liked rolling silverware in the beginning because they were mini dates with Ben 
where we could just sit and talk and roll.  

Ben had been working there a lot longer than me and was SO fast at his silverware, so he would always finish before me and have no choice but to head home or else he would look super weird for just hanging around when everyone else got out of there as fast as humanly possible when they were done.  
Until one particular night, Ben only had to roll about 80 silverware and I had to roll well over a hundred.  We were having our silverware rolling 'date' at booth 33, Zac, another server was sweeping his section beside us and hadn't even started rolling his silverware yet, it was Zac's last night and in all honesty he probably wasn't even going to roll his silverware at all that night.  Ben finished way before me and I felt so sad as he counted all 80 of his roll-ups while I was at like 35.  
The end of our date.  
Then Ben turned to Zac and said "Hey Zac if you pay me 5 bucks I'll roll your silverware for you"  This was an amazing deal, usually when you paid people to roll your silverware it was 10 dollars at least.  Zac said sure why not, gave Ben 5 dollars and Ben sat back down and started rolling silverware.

He was going to sit and roll silverware just to hang out with me longer. 
I had so many butterflies and when we were finally done at almost exactly the same time, we walked out, said goodnight and I smiled the whole drive home.  
He was into me, I was into him and we were going to get married.

Three months later, Ben was moving up to Canada with me for the summer, a month after that he was slipping a ring on my finger and three months after that I was marrying him in the Cardston Alberta temple.

I was driving past Chili's today to go pick up Ben from school and this night popped into my head. 
I thought I would write it down.

Happy Valentines Day.
I feel lucky to love and be loved.

first picture we ever took together

Tuesday, February 12, 2013


On Saturday my friends threw me a baby shower.
I felt very showered with love and it was so nice to have all my friends that could make it come 
celebrate this baby boy of ours.

The details were oh so cute, the food was delicious, the gifts were much needed, the games were hysterical
and the company was simply the best!

Thank you so much Jordan, Ie Ling and Jennica for throwing this shower for me 
and thanks to all my lovely friends and family left in Utah for coming!

The celebrity baby name game.  I am pretty proud to say I won this!! 
The E! channel comes in handy surprisingly often!

 This was the most hilarious game!  Jennica morphed my grown up face with celebrity faces to see what our babies would look like.  Then we had to try and guess the celebrity.  Oh and one of them was Ben and I's baby as well.  I got it wrong.  Can you tell which one is me and Harry Potters baby? Or me and the Biebs? 

This is me opening some lovely gifts...

And the whole gang....and me sitting in the most unflattering position any 8 month preggo could possibly be sitting in.

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Baby Making: 35 weeks

I know every post on here lately has been something to do with pregnancy and the baby, 
but it's because I cannot think of anything else to write about because all I think about these days is the little butternut squash growing inside me and what it's going to be like when he gets here.

I know I still have a few weeks to go but so far the third trimester has been my favorite!
I am throwing up less, I have only had mild heartburn a couple times and I love feeling him kick so much all the time.  I do have a lot of trouble sleeping these days, but I will take insomnia over nausea any day.
My cravings have pretty much gone away completely,actually my appetite has died way down and I don't really feel like eating anything, I just eat when I am hungry but nothing is tasting very delicious these days for some reason.

I finished up work this week and will have a little time to get ready for the baby before I head up to Canada.
It is kind of crazy to think that I will leave my house and the next time we come back 
there will be three of us!

There was a short time a couple weeks ago that my anxiety was taking over.  I was so nervous about every thing. I was not sleeping and just stressing out all night.  I was worried about the delivery, going to Canada, the nursery, money, breastfeeding, sleep deprivation , Ben's schedule, etc. just everything.  Ben is very good in these situations and never really stresses about anything.  When I tell him all the reasons I am worried, he just seems to make everything make more sense and tells me exactly how it will all work out.  So the stress period was short lived and I am feeling a lot less nervous and more excited!  I have also been reading some books that were recommended to me that are really helpful.

A lot of people ask if we have a name picked out yet.  We think we do, although Ben refuses to commit until we see him in person.  If we decide he is not this name we have picked out, it will be starting at square one and this babe might be nameless for weeks, because Ben and I do not agree on names at all!

The nursery is coming along, we painted it and have a little bit of furniture, there is so much I want to do but it adds up $$.  I am realizing we should have spaced out baby purchases more throughout the pregnancy and not left it all to the end. It is coming along slowly but surely though.  I have some DIY projects I am going to attempt in the upcoming weeks and even some sewing projects I want to try when I am in Canada.  This should be interesting due to the fact that my sewing experience is some pajama pants in a junior high sewing class.  Good thing I have very talented sewing relatives.

My baby shower here in Provo is this Friday and I am really excited, there is not too many of us left in Provo still but I just can't wait for a fun night with a few family and friends to talk all things baby! 

I can't believe how close we are getting.  I don't remember a time before I was pregnant, it has gone by really slow for me actually, and it has been really really hard at times.  Now all of a sudden I can say we are having our baby next month! 

I hope these last few weeks stay relatively comfortable, I am scared of the swelling people talk about at the end.  Mostly I am just hoping Ben will make it on time up to Canada for the delivery.  I am pretty confident we will be fine but just in case this baby comes like three weeks early and out of nowhere I pray he will make it on time.

37 days and counting!

Monday, February 4, 2013

Love. Really Love.

Bye January!
Kind of a depressing month if you ask me.
Welcome to February, the month of LOVE!

I think we all throw the word love around pretty loosely.
"I love her, I love them, I love those, I love that"

What do you really love though?

I really love Cafe Rio.  I could eat it every day.  It is my favorite food.  
I threw it up almost every time I ate it  the first 6 months of pregnancy but kept going back.
That's love.

I love Canada
I love my baby
I love my church
I love my TV shows
I love my family
I love my bed

Friday, February 1, 2013


  • 34 weeks pregnant and wearing my husbands clothes
  • Finishing up my last week of work!
  • Watched 4 seasons of The Good Wife and now slightly depressed I am caught up...I miss it
  • Painted the nursery all by ourselves and set up the crib, I get teary every time I walk by
  • I actually get teary for just about anything these days
  • Of course I'm sucked into the bachelor (I don't have a front runner yet.  Tiara is super cray cray, Leslie is a fan favorite but they are a little awk together, Des has super wet eyes, always looks like she is going to cry but I like her and Sean leads with the tongue, watching him kiss makes me want to crawl in a hole)
  • It has snowed so much here this past week, makes me never want to leave the house and it feels more like home.
  • Can't wait for Safe Haven, it's been a while since we've had a good chick flick!  Even when I am fast forwarding through commercials I stop and watch the preview if I see it. 
  • I now surf the 'kids' section of Pinterest rather than 'everything', I'm a real mom!
Fresh Paint!
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